The Twilight Saga: New Moon
Starring Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner
Starring John Cusak, Amanda Peet,
Starring Gabby Sidibe, Mo’Nique, Paula Patton, Mariah Carey
Starring Willem Dafoe, Charlotte Gainsbourg, a fox
Capitalism: A Love Story
I’m not sure if there is some unwritten law that we film critics are legitimately supposed to critique only the reel output of filmmakers, not their real world shenanigans. But if there is such a decree, I’m about to violate it. I admit it. Not sure what kind of punishment I face for breaking this “directive,” but the … um … temptation was just too strong. (Although I don’t have the excuse of being drunk or on some mind-altering substance.)
Starring Abbie Cornish, Ben Whishaw,
Have you heard this one? A couple walks into a community-based assistance office seeking advice on securing a mortgage without declaring income or filing income taxes because they engage in a profession that is exclusively paid for with cash. As some of the advisers work furtively with this situation so that the young couple can finally become homeowners, it’s clear that this is a pimp and his prostitute.
Starring Sharlto Copley, Jason Cope, David James, Vanessa Haywood, Mandla Gaduka
Rating: Just in time for back-to-school, these three films feel like they were made by students for students — sort of like those bygone After School Specials.